Never Look Back
Mistakes were made. Hasty decisions that lead to heartache. Boundaries were set and then broken. eyes cried tears of wishful thinking, wishful molding and hoping…maybe someday he’ll change. just slightly rearrange. transform into the man that I see in my dreams. he’s already a king. but is he the king God created for me? wishful thinking. heart leaping into his arms wide open to me. head over heals, nose wide open for me. 6 years on again off again waiting for me. bend over backwards, climb the highest mountain, swim the deepest sea for me. elevates me like a queen should be. would get on one knee with a ring for me if he knew I’d say yes. wants nothing but the best for me…honors and adores me…as I adore him. I love his quick wit won’t quit mindset. his confident grown man swagger. his passion and humility captivates me. he’s already a king…but is he the king God created for me? wishful thinking lead me to believe he could be the one for me. mistakes were made. hasty decisions that lead to heartache. neither one of us meant for it to be this way…I’ll take the blame. cause deep down I knew. but wishful thinking lead to soul linking. love put stars in my eyes. couldn’t see past the feeling you brought me. wanted you to be the one to lead me. never knew a love like this…didn’t want to miss the friendship, the royal treatment…but he’s not the king for me. it was all wishful thinking. trying to rush what I want…
want to be in love with the one designed to complete me. want to be me and be completely understood without saying a word. want to be heard without speaking. want to be teaching but be taught as well. want to follow my man, not lead him. want to add to his plan, not be it. I want to see God in his eyes, his desire to rise and conquer all that stands in between him and his destiny. want him to lean not on his own understanding, but the Lord’s. want him to want more for him, don’t want to be his only motivation…want him to be motivated within. don’t want to be his connection to God…want him to be connected himself. want him to pray for himself…always been here to help but can’t keep doing it for you…so…
for all that you are and all that you’re becoming…I thank you. thank you for the love you’ve shown me and never stopped giving. thank you for sacrificing yourself for me…thank you. I thank you for being my homie, for loving me so purely. thank you for your sincerity. may God reveal to you His glory and your true queen…because…two different minds and perspectives, with two different sets of objectives, going in two different directions, never make a good match…but I will love you forever. I’m learning that when a thing is done it’s done. and as much as it hurts…never look back.
selena j poetry
